I’ve fallen in love with my best friend. We met through my brother about two years ago, and started to work together about a year ago. We’d been hanging out ever since we met but it became more frequent after we started working together. He would ask me to his house to hang out.
About four months ago he got into a car accident and I was his ride to and from work so eventually we were together all the time at work, and out of work, and on the weekends.
Well one night while I was at his apartment it was getting late so I decided to leave he asked me if I was ok to drive home? And if I wasn’t that I could stay the night. It wasnt the first time he had asked this, But that night when he asked I accepted because I had been getting that feeling that things were changing between us. He said there were no extra blankets but I could sleep with him if I wanted to so I did.
We laid there for a moment than eventually we started to cuddle. He than asked what was going on between us and I just said I dont know, because at the time I didnt realize that i cared so much for him. So we fell asleep and in the morning we woke up and had sex.
He asked me again (“what was going on”) and I was more confused because like I said at the time I didnt know how i felt for him, so I just said I dont know. I was scared at that moment I’d never stayed the night at a guys house and to top things off we had unprotected sex. Somthing that I never did before even as a teenager no matter how fast my hormones were going I always made sure it was safe sex.
Anyway before I left he asked me not to change and start acting weird, he also said he would call to see how I was doing later and he did.
When we had our conversation about what happen, it was just him saying that he felt real comfortable with me like he could tell me anything and that maybe thats why we slept together that and his hormones ragging (he’s 23yrs old Im 22yrs old). This was after I had failed to answer his question and turned it on him. It hurt for him to say that it was his hormones in control of the situation and at that time I realized that it was my heart in control of mine.
We still see each other at work of course, but he only invites me to his apartment during the day and when he does we’re on a time limit. And slowly but surly we’ve started to drift apart. Please help I just want your advice or opinon on the situation. Do u think I should try to keep things together or just let them go. — Jane
………………………………….
Dear Jane, he was looking for a better answer than “I don’t know” when he asked how you felt. When you couldn’t give any importance to what had happened, he tried to save face by his “raging hormones” remark. What else would any guy be expected to do? Hang his heart on his sleeve for an “I don’t know”?
If you really like this guy — and I’m assuming you do like in if you’ve had sex with him — then tell him how you really feel. Don’t worry about him hurting your feelings. Anything he says won’t hurt you as much as you have already hurt him by not showing that what happened between the two of you was something very special.
If you want this guy, go after him. NOW! — Queenie