Dear queenie, i had been dating a guy for 2 years, and he was great. we spent as much time together as we could but it never seemed to be enough. we always wanted to see each other more. as time went on, we grew closer, and i really began to love him.
I think that after a year we needed some time apart and so we thought it was better to spend some time away from eachother. We were seperate for a month and then we got back together. In that time i had a one-time-thing with a friend and i didnt tell him about it. So, when we got back together he had no idea what i had been up to.
Our relationship continued and 9 months later he found out about this other man. Of course he didnt like it, but the thing that hurt him most is that i lied to him about it. We split again. This time for 3 weeks… In the end he realised that it was better living with me than without me.
We went on vacation together and had an amazing time. However, he did bring the incident up every once in a while. I guess he still didnt completely trust me and it was obviously bothering him.
Now one week ago he broke up with me. He said he couldnt handle being jealous anymore. How he wanted to be single and be “himself” again. Ive asked him whether he is happy and he told me he was. He has clearly shown me that he doesnt want me back.
But i love this man so much… more than anyone i have ever met before. he feels so special to me. I dont think i could ever forget about him. I think i need some advice on how to win him back. Or even advice on how to forget about him.
All the people around me tell me to get over him and to move on… but i dont want to. I want to be with him again. I know it has only been a week, but im beginning to think its getting too late, and you are my last hope…. please reply.
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I hate to tell you this, but, as your “last hope” I’m going to tell you the same thing other people have been telling you. Move on. Get over him.
It doesn’t matter what you want, it takes two people to make a couple. If he doesn’t want to be part of a couple with you, you’re out of luck no matter how much you want it to happen.
You won’t forget him instantly; it takes time to get over being dumped. But millions of people have survived dumpings and you will, too.
Don’t beg, plead, cry, whine, or tell your sad story to everyone you meet. Let it go. The sooner you stop trying to get back into this relationship, the sooner your independence will make you attractive to someone else.
If he still loves you, he won’t come back while you’re still so dependent on him for your happiness. If he still loves you, and there’s no guarantees that he does, he’ll come back if and when he thinks you’re getting over him.
That’s what I think. Do with it as you will. — Queenie