I dated P for 1 year and then moved west to teach. He told me he would give me one year and then he wanted me to move back east. We dated long distance throughout that year and at the end I did not know if he was the one for me. I told him I need more time to make sure. I was trying to find myself.
Just at that time when he had asked me to come back for the last time, he started hanging out with the wife of a co-worker. They were having problems and were friends with P. She told P of her interest in him and they ended up sleeping together and when her husband found out and they got a divorce.
So, she started hanging out with P. I met her and P told me they were just friends. Well, they have been hanging out this entire year while I am across the country. They sleep together, spend birthdays together and holidays.
P tells me that he still loves me today and that the reason why everything is like it is is because he decided he did not want to have a long distance relationship anymore. He also said that he does not think his feelings are there for her.
He has said this for this entire year. He tells me it is not what you think. He says it is just not there with her yet he will not see me, does not want me to visit and is planning to hang out with her now over me.
I ask him if I could come back east and he says the timing is off and everything is what it is. I realized that I really do love him and he is my best friend. The problem is is that he is developing a solid friendship with her, has hung out with her for a year and want to continue to hang out with her yet does not think the feelings are there for her.
Is he just wanting me to be there in case it does not work out? Is that why he tells me he still loves me and that is why everything is so difficult for him. What is going to make him not want to be with her or develop feelings for her if they hang out all the time and are best friends, sleep together, everything.
Should I just forget about him? It is so hard because I love him and I let him go first when he wanted to be with me? What do I do? Is he playing games with me and really wants to be with her? Is he bitter at me for not coming back when he wanted me too? — Jenny
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Jenny, he is stringing you on while he makes a life with her. How much time do you plan on wasting on this man? He has shown his true colors and they aren’t red/white/blue.
If he had truly been in love with you, he wouldn’t have cheated on you. And, with the wife of a co-worker?
Consider yourself lucky to have found out before he had a chance to put you through the hell of an adulterous marriage.
Just my opinion. How much time you waste on trying to get him back is up to you. — Queenie