Dear Queenie, I have been with my boyfriend for 2 and a half years and we have been engaged for 1 year. Everything was great in the beginning, he was affectionate and I fell for him very quickly but lately he has changed.
Ever since he has become a manager and has a new car he has became very big headed and acts if nothing matters but materialistic things.
We spend a lot of time together but lately he has been with his friends a lot. I don’t mind that but when I want to have fun and just go out and be with him he doesn’t want to but when his friends ask he goes with them. He says he is not cheating and I want to have trust in him and believe that he isn’t but how much can a woman take?
Is it just me being insecure and selfish or does he just not want to be with me anymore? Please help me! — Yvette
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Yvette, the time the two of you spend together before marriage is when he is on his best behavior. If this is his best, what do you think you’ll get if you marry him? Do you like him as much this way as when you first were engaged? Love should grow stronger the longer you are with someone, not get less and less.
If you think he isn’t able to be the type of boyfriend and husband you need, break the engagement and explain why. Maybe he does want to break up but doesn’t know how to tell you or maybe he has gotten too comfortable in the relationship and is taking you for granted.
He will either work hard to become the man you need or he won’t try because he doesn’t care. It is better to know before marriage that a relationship isn’t worth saving rather than going through divorce later on.
It’s your life, your decision. All I can do is make suggestions based upon what you tell me. — Queenie