I am 27 years old, ive been in a relationships in the past but right im committed to my boyfriend of 8 years who left the country almost two years ago to work. Ive known an officemate and we seemed to like each other though we are both committed in fact her gf and him has been together for 8 years too.
last year, we get to hang-out and everything happened so fast, we fell in love, it wasnt affair, one way or another he has proven his love for me. his gf found out and he told me (with teary eyes) that we should end our relationship.
my problem now is that, we are in the same company, same department so we have to talk everyday, we usually goes home together but now hes waiting for his gf to arrive everyday. My boyfriend is returning this November.
the way i see our situation, i could still feel that he has a feelings for me, i know, because we know each other very well, and sometimes i felt that he doesnt want to loose me, and hes willing to entertain the thought of me forgetting him. I admit i still have feeling for him right now, i also thought that leaving is the best way for me to move on, i want to gather the pieces of that ive lost.
Can you tell, what’s wrong with our case? is it possible that we end up together? Does he really loved me? im so confused i really wanted to move on, but i don’t know i felt im stocked on this. please help me analyse things. i would greatly appreciate if you could send your advice through my email. thank you very i know your a blessing in disguise, quennie.
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Well, first of all, I don’t respond by email so maybe I’m not such a blessing in disguise.
And second of all, you may not have had a physical sexual affair but you certainly have had and are still having an emotional affair with this guy.
And third, you aren’t committed right now to your boyfriend who has been out of the country while all of this has been happening. If you were committed, none of this would have happened and you wouldn’t be struggling with trying to figure out the future.
He has a convenient reason to stay with his girlfriend – she’ll harm herself if he leaves. I’d take that as a clue he won’t leave her for you.
Does he really love you? Well, he might be able to love two people at the same time but that’s really spreading the love a little thin for both people and neither will get as much love as they should have. Since she is in “possession” of him, and he’s not leaving, I’d say his love is stronger for her.
So, what do you do? If those pieces you’re trying to gather belong with your long term boyfriend then get busy and gather then so when he comes back there’ll be a relationship worth working on. If those pieces belong with this new guy, who has a girlfriend, you might want to let them go.
Just my thoughts about this situation. I’m sure you’ll figure out what you want to do. ~ Queenie