I have been with my boyfriend for about a year now. We both went to the same school and lived together and had wonderful times together. Well, last summer he has to move 6 hours away for a job while i had to stay put to finish school.
Things were okay at first but now they are bad. we constantly fight and when we do he wins the argument and I break because his argumentative skills are better than mine are.
Our latest fight is what i need help with. I have complained to him before that he needs to be more responsive with my calls. On Thanksgiving, he called me once in the morning before i was awake and he didn’t respond to my subsequent calls. Then next day (a day and a half of not talking) i yelled at him for not calling me. He says he tried but calling once is not trying.
He says im too neurotic with the phone and I say that with a long distance relationship, the phone is all we’ve got. He says he’s not going to change and I think this is a problem because if he really loves me, he would want to fix the problem with a simple, easy phone call. Help.
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So the problem is his and he should fix it if he loves you? How about you fixing your expectations instead if you love him?
Long distance relationships are difficult. They can also point out the weaknesses in a relationship. That’s what I see happening between the two of you. You want daily phone calls with him. He doesn’t need that much contact.
So, getting back to “if he really loves me, he would want to fix the problem” — perhaps there’s your answer. Maybe he’s just not really in love with you enough to meet your needs. — Queenie