Dearest Queenie, I waited for this guy “K” for a year and 9 months while he was doing his time in jail. He loves me and I knew he was the only guy I had so much feeling for, maybe it was my insecurities or maybe I was listening to my mother too much. She told me that it was best if I be with the one that loves me rather than the one I loved. That way I wouldn’t be mistreated.
Well, not knowing what was best I went ahead and tried to let “K” go and got with my homeboy instead. His name is “T”, he really loves me, almost too much. He’s very over-protective but he gives everything I want and need. He’s always there.
The only problem is it’s been three years and I can’t forget about “K.” A whole week of “T” trying to make me happy only takes just a glimpse of “K’s” picture to bring a smile to my face.
I heard from a close friend that when “K” seen me he was so hurt that he didn’t know what to say to me. I know that he is now with someone else but could it really be over for me and “K”?
I recently found out that he got locked up again. Should I write to him? If so how can I convince or let him know that I still miss him and love him. What should I do? Should I break up with “T”? “T” have me but he doesn’t conquer my heart. Should I follow my heart but what if I end up getting hurt? Am I being selfish? Please help.
………………………………..
Your mother could see that “K” was a bad influence and that “T” was a better long term choice. Unfortunately, even though she’s right, you want the guy you don’t have (who is with someone else), not the one you do have (who is devoted to you).
It has to be your choice. If you follow your heart you may very well get hurt but you already know that. No one can lead your life for you, you’ll have to make your own decisions and learn the hard way if you’ve made bad decisions. Personally, I think “K” is trouble in the long term and if you decide you just have to declare your love for him, don’t expect life with him to be easy. — Queenie