Dear Queenie, 2 weeks ago my girlfriend (17yrs) and me (23yrs) broke up after 2 and a half years together. Her reasons for breaking up were that she wasn?t in love with me anymore, she didn?t want to be in a relationship and she just wanted to act like a normal teenager.
We were each other?s first love and we lost our virginity to each other, and she had been living with my family and me for the last 7 months.
Just 1 week before we broke up she told me before going to sleep that she loved me so much and didn?t ever want to leave me. However 2 days after breaking up with me she got together with a 34 year old guy who she had only met about 2 weeks before we broke up, and they have already slept together.
4 days ago she moved out and is now living with this guy and his friend. Some things he tells her about him seem like total lies and I feel very worried for her as this guy might be some sort of creep, he says he is already in love with her and she told me yesterday that she is as well but hasn?t told him yet, she also told me that when they kiss or have sex there is no feeling between them like there was between us, but she wants to spend the rest of her life with him which hurts me very much.
I still love and care for her very much, is this just a phase she is going through or will she be back??? — Heartbroken
………………………………..
If my math is correct, she was 14 (and a half) and you were 20 (and a half) when the two of you started dating. So far, I don’t see where she’s had a chance to be a “normal” teenager, whatever that means to her.
I consider a “normal teenager” one who goes to school, graduates, perhaps goes on to college, lives with their own family, and does the “fun” teenage things like hanging out with friends, going to the prom, and having lots of crushes.
Is leaving you to immediately “fall in love” with someone 11 years older than you, someone double her age, just a phase? I don’t know. Will she be back? I don’t know.
And I’m not sure why she’s telling you about their kissing and sex or that she wants to spend the rest of her life with him if she knows that you still love her. Or did you do something to hurt her and she’s getting even? — Queenie