My best friend and lover and I decided to make a commitment to share our lives together, not necessarily get married. We live 4 hours apart but are trying to get closer. I am by nature a very jealous person and she is by nature a very outgoing person.
Last weekend was not good for us as I asked her to come see me, she declined saying she wanted to do her own thing. She went bowling with friends, an old high school friend which was a male and went out with him again on sunday. This really upset me and I made her mad with the way I reacted, jealous.
Now she tells me she thinks we need a break, I said we need to sit down and talk face to face, not on the phone and reslove our issues. This is the third time in 6 months she has said a break is needed, so far I have convinced her not to do that. What do I do? — Bill
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Bill, she’s telling you what you need to do. Let her go. Give her a break. Take a break yourself. You can’t hold someone in a relationship if they don’t want to be held. Let her have her space and take some space for yourself, too. Don’t push her, don’t call her, don’t chase her.
Let her have all the freedom and space she needs. And if you’ll start dating, and keeping your options open, she’ll see that if she walks away, you won’t be alone for long. She may come back, she may not. You shouldn’t put your life on hold waiting for something that may not happen. — Queenie