Dear Queenie, Ive been with my boyfriend for six years and when were at home we argu because he looks at porn and play’s porn games that you interact with by moving the mouse around.
When we go out to stores or a movie or wherever he always always stairs at other women’s breast and behinds and he dosent just look he gocks and its not just women its sixteen and up and its not just one or two women it’s everysingle one that he see’s or he thinks he can get away with but I see him doing it.
This hurts so much because I love him so much but a lot of bad feelings are geting bottled up and I know that cant be good be cause it makes me want to get him back somehow and make him feel like I do.
We have talked about it and he tells me he loves me. Please can you give me your Expert advice. — Char
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Char, as long as your boyfriend looks but doesn’t touch that’s a point in his favor. Of course, I don’t see a reason why you can’t look at other guys, too. After all, your boyfriend can’t be “all that” over every other guy you see, can he? Maybe if he sees you looking and you explain that you’re just enjoying the sights the same as he does, he’ll get the message.
The porn is a little different. Is he using porn as a substitute for sex with you? Or do you and he have a good sex life, one that you’re happy with, and the porn is a little extra on the side for him? If the porn is taking away from the intimacy between the two of you, then you have a problem that needs correcting. The two of you need to talk about it, maybe get counseling.
You’ve been together for six years. If this has been going on for all that time, he’s got a habit that’ll be difficult to break — if he even wants to break it. If it’s something recent, think back to what may have started all of this.
Either way, you have to decide if this is how you want to live the rest of your life. Do you? — Queenie