Hi: I really need advice, I’m very confused… I’m 20 yrs. old, and I’m obsessing over a 30 yr. old guy, is that normal??
Last year, one of my mom’s friends invited us to her wedding, we went, and there I saw a guy (J, 30 yrs.), he was the DJ, of the wedding…….I didn’t talk to him or anything, but I liked him, so I asked about him someone told me his last name, so I managed to get his emai by my end……I sent him an email, then I told him who I was, I don’t know if he remembered he said he did, I didn’t tell him I liked him…..That was last year, we didn’t email each other everyday……..
Now we still email each other, but I barely see him online, I guess he’s always busy…..He works too hard. Anyway, the mother-in-law of my mom’s friend (the one that got married) told my mom that I had an admirer, and my mom told me that she said that J was my admirer, I don’t know if it’s true.
He invited me to go see a movie, but at the last minute he cancelled he said that his mom was going to use the car (he lives far away from the theatre we were going to go to) he said it would have to be in other ocassion, he also sent me text message on my cell, to tell me that he had to cancel, I was so mad, because I was very happy, the feeling that he lied to me crossed my mind.
He is friend with the sons of the mother in law of my mom’s friend…..So the mother in law says she knows him…….I sent him an email asking him if it was true that his mom had to use the car, or if he regret the fact that he invited me, he didn’t reply…….3 days passed by already, and I haven’t heard from him……
What should I do? Do you think he’s too old for me?? He’s 30 and I’m 20……I really like him, but I think that he thinks I’m someone else, I don’t really think he knows who I am, he says he does, but I’m scared to think about the fact that he might think of me as someone else…..
He g ave me his work number and his cell number, I gave him my cell number…..If he liked me don’t you think he would at least try to get online more often? I mean 3 days………
What should I do?? I’m a very shy person, and I’m so scared…….Please I beg you, Help me!!!!! What should I do????
Thank you so much for your time!!! — Arlene
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Arlene, you have never gone out with this man and yet you get angry when he is unable to keep a date with you, and you question whether or not he is lying to you?
You aren’t sure that he knows exactly who you are and yet you stay in email contact but you also get angry when he doesn’t keep up daily contact. You’re acting as though the two of you are committed to each other when there is absolutely nothing going on. What in the world would you do if the two of you actually were dating?
Yes, you are probably too young for this man, not in years but in your dating experience. You have turned a chance event into a full-blown fantasy relationship. That’s not how it works.
Please, calm down, slow down, and don’t chase this guy (and others in your future) away by being so possessive and obsessive. Just my thoughts, anyway. — Queenie