I hope someone can help me because I don’t know what to do or think. About 5 months ago I starting dating this guy and it was intense from the start although in our first conversation he said he wasn’t ready for me yet which I thought was odd.
He had recently ended a relationship with this girl that was pretty bad although they went back and forth for over 1 1/2 years but his friends said that he spent more time trying to get rid of her than he was with her. He told me she wanted to get married and he had been married once and wasn’t looking to do it agin at least not now and he told me if he did it wouldn’t have been her.
Anyway she started coming around around and harrassing him and he told me he felt bad for her because she had no family and was a screw up. Meanwhile he told me he thought he was falling for me and it scared him and each time he did he would back away but not all the way.
We never had a bad word between us and he said he needed someone like me who he could talk to and who would REALLY listen. He said he never met someone he was so compatible with and he hadn’t felt this way in 10 years. He said when he thought of me it made him happy.
We always had a great time and I too fell for him but then a month ago he abruptly told me he needed time and he didn’t know if he could be in a relationship. I told him I never asked for anything I just wanted to take it one day at a time and he didn’t believe it I guess.
He had said that he didn’t know if he wanted to date just one person which I knew he was seeing her so I said what if we dated others would it make it easier and he made a face. I don’t think he wants me going out with anyone else. He is very jealous and thinks every guy is after me.
I’ve only seen him twice since and he has behaved hostile to me and his friend told me he was crazy about me but confused. So I found out he is seeing this other girl again and when I sent him an email he immediately answered and when I didn’t quickly answer him, he sent me a hostile one trying to get me to respond. His relationship with this other girl is and never was good. Even his friends said so.
They fight all the time and she’s alway demanding things from him and telling him what to do. They say he has never been happy with her and he is just very confused. I still have feelings for him and his friends think he will try to get me back especially when he hears I have started dating.
Do you think he will try to get in touch or has he forgotten me and let me go for good? Sorry for the long story but I KNOW this guy was happy wih me but scared so what can I do? Does this make any sens and will i hear from him again? Please help.–georgy
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Georgy, whether or not she makes him happy he’s with her and not you. Actions speak a whole lot louder than words and listening to what his friends say is getting you older but no closer to the kind of relationship you want with him.
He’s an adult. He doesn’t have to be with her if he didn’t want to be with her. Being with someone because you feel sorry for them is one of the oldest lines in the book but it still works because there are enough gullible, starry-eyed people to believe that someone actually would give up love to stay with someone they don’t get along with and feel sorry for.
Walk away from this guy. Go on dates and enjoy yourself. There’s someone out there who will love you for yourself and not give you some silly story to explain why you’re staying home waiting for his call while he’s with someone else. — Queenie