My husband has been cheating for about years… He told me he was traveling for business but I have found out he has been traveling to another state to be with this woman and her daughter… I never thought he would do that to me and our three boys…
How can I trust him again if I didn’t know he was lying that whole time to me…? He said he wants us to work out but I also found out he was still trying to save the relationship with the other woman… buy telling her he served me with papers for a divorce when he didn’t… She has told me herself that he has been trying to contact her… What can I do…? I love him but I don’t want to be his fool. — Jennifer
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Jennifer, would your life be better with or without him? That’s the bottom line here since apparently he tells you what he thinks you want to hear but his actions make his words a lie (assuming you can believe what the other woman is telling you).
You aren’t a fool for wanting your marriage to work and giving him every opportunity to prove that he’s as committed to the relationship as you are. When you have determined that he isn’t capable of committing on the same level as you are you’ll have to decide whether or not you can accept what he is capable of giving to the marriage.
You have choices which means you control the situation. That should give you some comfort even if he’s not being the husband you need him to be. If you do decide that you would rather live without him, don’t let him know until you have a very good plan of action in place to protect yourself financially and legally.
Just my opinion, of course. — Queenie