Ok here is goes.. I am dating this woman.. she is the niece of one of my best friends. She is 30… I do not share the same feelings for her as she does for me. I know no matter what this is going to hurt her…It has only been three months, slept together like 3 times and I only see her once in a while. I have no idea how to break it to her that I cannot be with her any more.
I was in a really long term relationship, and she really did a number on me. My best friend should be ok with it, not like he is going to kill me, but I know she is going to go to him. How can I get out of this, with minimal damage?
Sending an email is surely the wuss way out, but she lives with her parents still and I really want to avoid any major drama…and at least I won’t have to deal with the tears and the drama that will go along with this, and I KNOW there will be.. Email at least I can get my feelings out more easily.
I am a typical guy, who cannot talk face to face about feelings. Yes I want my cake and to eat it too, but I do feel really badly about having to break it off, but I cannot keep her stringing along… Signed, BIG WUSS WHO NEEDS MAJOR HELP
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Well, Big Wuss, I have to agree with your signature. So you’re a “typical guy” who can’t talk about feelings? That’s really going to help you when you find the woman you want more than anything in this world and you fall back on your “typical guy” excuse and she decides she’d rather be with someone who wasn’t so “typical.”
Any time you break up with someone there are going to be tears, at least there will be if they care for you. It’s a shame you’ve been stringing her along and I suppose you’ve been saying whatever it took in order to get her to sleep with you. Unfortunately, you being a “typical guy” don’t put sex and love in the same sentence but typical women do. So, when you had sex with her she saw it as “making love” and thought there was more to the relationship than just some easy sex.
I think you need to meet her for a cup of coffee and tell her you’re not healed from your last relationship and you need your “space.” Women understand that men do need space and that some men might have a hard time dealing with long term break-ups. It lets her down easy.
You don’t go opening your mouth to your best friend and tell him how much of a dog she was and how you finally cut her loose. You just tell him you didn’t want her to expect more than you could give at this time.
Try being a gentleman, not a jerk. Email is the coward’s way out. Or the way a big wuss would do it. — Queenie